Puzzle Fundraiser Update

Our puzzle fundraiser has been going on for 2.5 weeks and it has been such a huge encouragement so far! We are blown away by the generosity of all the people who have joined us in this journey. We feel so loved and supported and it's just been a really amazing feeling! I've actually been getting really emotional about it, especially from all of the nice messages I've been getting from people. Shifting our focus from infertility to adoption has brought some emotions that I wasn't expecting. I knew that infertility made me feel isolated and lonely, but I never expected that sharing our adoption journey would make me feel so lifted up and loved. I literally feel like all of you are coming around me and giving me a big virtual hug. And I NEEDED that!! I didn't even realize how badly I needed it until it started happening and I've just been really overwhelmed with the gratitude of it. So thank you ALL so much for making me feel so much love.

So far we have had 83 of the 252 pieces of our puzzle claimed!! If you have already donated, THANK YOU!! Check out your name on your pieces! It's been really exciting to write the names out and watch the pieces fill up with color and love.

There are still 169 pieces left to go. If you feel led to help us, or know of someone who might like to follow our journey too, please share our story and our puzzle with them! Our hearts are so grateful for every penny and prayer.

Check out all your names!

For anyone who wants to donate and missed our last post about the puzzle:

-Each piece will represent someone who donated to help us bring home our baby!
-Each puzzle piece is a minimum donation of $25!
-You may want to be represented on 1 piece of our puzzle or many pieces!
-Your name will be written on the back of each piece that you represent.
-Once the puzzle is finished it will be framed in a double sided glass frame and hung in our sweet baby's nursery. It will forever be a cherished piece of art and reminder of who was part of our journey with us!
-To donate, you can click on our YouCaring page that is linked on the right of our blog. We also have a paypal link right below the YouCaring link. You can also email me at Charlotte.sorrill@Gmail.com if you want to send a check.

Thank you all SO much for your support, prayers and encouragement. You have no idea how much it means to us. This experience has been unforgettable and we are so excited to see what else is in store for us!

The cost of adoption....and Jewelry!

Hi everyone! I am writing tonight about the costs involved in private domestic adoption and why it is so expensive. I have been asked this question so many times because when people hear the number it sounds impossibly crazy!

But first....I finally have my Etsy page set up with all of the jewelry I've been making! I will be updating it regularly as I make new pieces. I had NO idea how much fun it would be to make jewelry.  It is so relaxing and I feel so creative doing it. I literally jumped with glee when I got my first order!! Here is the link, and also some pictures of some of my favorite pieces.

Www.etsy.com/shop/findingbabysorrill

The costs involved in adoption
The average cost of a private adoption in the United States is between $25,000-$50,000. Here is a breakdown of what that involves. It varies A LOT and can be less or more depending on each individual situation.

• Home study fee: $1500-3500 depending on the state and agency. 
• Consultant fee: $2,000-$3500 
• Cost of our profile books and own advertising: $500ish
• Agency fees for advertising, showing our profile book, match and placement fees, interstate fees, etc: $20,000-$30,000
• Birth mother expenses: Can be $0 or upwards of $10,000+.  I think most states have a limit though. The cost can include living expenses, medical coverage if there is no insurance, transportation to doctor, counseling, meals..Etc Etc. (if the adoption does not go through and the mother changes her mind, these expenses are not refundable).
• Newborn hospital care (usually mostly covered under adoptive parents insurance)
• Legal services and court costs paid to an attorney: I have no idea how much this can cost but I know it can be a lot. Depends on the lawyer used and the state's laws.
• Travel expenses: If baby is born out of state we will have to travel to that state and wait for 5-10 business days before we can bring baby home. That could mean worse case scenario flying and renting a car and staying in a hotel for 2 weeks.

The cost of adoption is a huge deterrent for most couples wanting to adopt, and I'm sure most people think we are crazy for attempting to grow our family this way while Wes is still in medical school. Maybe we are crazy! It definitely makes this journey more challenging but God placed it on our hearts to have a family now so we are trusting and just going to do everything it takes to make it happen. It's not easy to ask for help but we realize that this would be impossible to do on our own. It really makes the saying "it takes a village" a true statement. It's been beyond amazing so far seeing how many people care about us and want to help. 

How much do we need to raise?

We are hoping to raise at least $20,000. This number intimidates me so much and seems so impossible! Between the money we hope to raise and all the money we thought we were saving to buy a house we should hopefully be able to cover the cost of our adoption. I've seen God provide for my family so many times and I know that everything will work out. Please continue to pray for us in this journey!!

June Happenings

Hey everyone! Well, lots has been happening here the last week. Several people have already participated in our Puzzle Fundraiser which has been so amazing and exciting!! I'll do an update on that soon. Thank you so much to everyone who has helped us!!!

Last weekend we drove to Ann Arbor to visit lots of family and go to my friends bridal shower. My friend was nice enough to take some pictures of me and Wes for our adoption profile book! They turned out really cute and I'm so excited to work on our book more. Here are some of the pictures:) Thank you so much Kelly for taking these!!!

 

So the most exciting news is that we finally got our first big chunk of home study stuff done and the papers and our check were all mailed! We had a frustrating delay with one of Wes' medical forms but he got it straightened out in person the next day so it didn't hold us up more than 2 days, which is good because I was so excited I was going crazy. Now the next step is waiting for the home study coordinator to call us to schedule our FIRST in person meeting at the agency. I've been really anxious for this because it will make the process seem a little bit more real. I am HOPING we can be finished with the home study by the end of July. Please say some prayers for us that we can keep it moving quickly! 

 

me mailing our big packet of forms to the home study agency!

Please keep praying with us that our home study continues to move along and that we can be approved soon and ready to be showing our profile book to expectant mothers. And please pray for our precious future child and his/her mother and family right now. I keep feeling this sense of urgency in running out and finding him/her. This is going to be the most prayed for baby ever!!

Thanks for checking in and being a part of this journey with us!!!

Will you help us bring home our missing piece?! Puzzle Fundraiser

We are SO excited to start our PUZZLE FUNDRAISER!!! Will you help us bring home our missing piece?

Everyone who donates to our adoption through this fundraiser becomes a permanent part of our adoption journey through a piece of our puzzle!

Here's how it works:
We have customized a 252 piece puzzle. I actually painted it by hand, uploaded to photoshop for the text (I have terrible handwriting) and then had the image printed on a puzzle!
-Each piece will represent someone who donated to help us bring home our baby!
-Each puzzle piece is a minimum donation of $25!
-You may want to be represented on 1 piece of our puzzle or many pieces!
-Your name will be written on the back of each piece that you represent.
-Once the puzzle is finished it will be framed in a double sided glass frame and hung in our sweet baby's nursery. It will forever be a cherished piece of art and reminder of who was part of our journey with us!

When our puzzle is complete we will have hopefully raised $6,300!!!

To be a part of this fundraiser just click on our YouCaring link on the right side of my blog, or the PayPal link. We are so blessed and thankful beyond words for each and every one of you that takes part in this fundraiser!!! We are SO excited to share in this journey with you and FIND OUR MISSING PIECE!!

For those of you who have already donated via our YouCaring page or PayPal THANK YOU!!! Your names are already represented on puzzle pieces which means you were the first ones to be part of this!

What we are up to and the home study process

I'm sure you are all wondering what we have been up to and where we are at in the process so I thought I would do a little update and talk about what the actual home study process is like....so far at least.

But first I want to say thank you, THANK YOU, thank youuuuu from the bottom of our hearts for all of the love and support we have received so far. It's been amazing being able to share this journey with people and I've been getting emails and messages from so many people with encouragement and personal stories etc. It's been so heartwarming. We have already received several donations and we just can't thank people enough. I wish I could give each of you a hug and have you over for dinner. Wes would cook of course and bake fresh bread because lately that's been his favorite thing to do. But seriously, thank you all so much.

So the last 3 weeks have been filled with gathering paperwork and filling out forms. The hardest part so far has been getting our medical forms signed by our doctors. Since we both had already had physicals within the last year we had to get the forms to our doctors which turned out to be kind of a hassle. And then as soon as we thought we were ready to send everything in to the social worker we realized that I had missed one of the forms in our huge DCFS packet so I had to go BACK to both doctors offices to drop the new form of and I'll have to go back to pick it up later this week.

This is me dropping off the form for the second time today. 

Here is a breakdown of our TO DO list for our home study.

• Submit application and fee. DONE
• Fingerprinting and background check. DONE
• CPR Certification class for Charlotte. DONE
• Doctors appointments with forms needing to be filled out. Almost done:/
• Fill out DCFS Application. DONE
• Fill out foster family home info forms. DONE
• Five references from non relatives. DONE
• Two family references. DONE
• 4 hours of adoption training. DONE 
• Send final $2,700 to cover the home study. DONE

This is where we are right now. Here is what's coming up. (yikes)

• Biographical questions about our family, history, future plans etc(basically a 4 page essay) about ourselves DONE
•  First meeting with social worker DONE
• Get cats vaccinated (I'm not a good vet goer) DONE
• Mail lots of documents to agency social worker DONE
• birth certificates
• mariage license
• pet inoculations
• latest 1040
• driver's license
• health insurance
• auto insurance
• Second meeting with social worker.
• Draw floor plan of house.
• 5 or so more hours of video training DONE
• Confirm background clearances have arrived
• FBI
• Illinois State Police
• Child Abuse
• Sex Offender
• Third meeting with social worker which takes place at our house and includes a safety inspection or our house.
• Lots of papers to sign in front of social worker.
• Social worker writes our Home Study 
• Agency reviews file and recommends that we get our foster family license

Apart from working on our home study, I have been BUSY with making our profile book and writing our "dear expectant parent" letter. The profile book is basically a photo book done in something like shutterfly and it's a book explaining us and our whole lives. This is one of the most important things for us to do since THIS is what expectant mothers will look through when deciding who they want their baby's family to be. It's weird to feel like we are marketing ourselves, but that's kind of what it is. We need to stand out among all the other family's books. It's REALLY hard to write about yourself too. I can easily talk about how awesome Wes is, but trying to portray how "great we are" is really awkward and difficult. But, making the profile book is one of the funnest parts for me because I love graphic design and photos so much. So I'm having fun with it. I'm getting close-ish to being done with it. Here is a ROUGH DRAFT peek at one of our pages.

The other things I have been so busy on is preparing some fundraisers. I just painted some cute nursery art and I'm having it printed on a puzzle for a puzzle fundraiser! It should be coming in the mail next week and I'll be sharing details and starting it right away. I'm excited about this one!

I've also been making jewelry like a mad lady. I'm planning to start up an Etsy shop and sell it through there, at neighborhood sales, and maybe I'll even do an auction. I'm not sure yet. But I need a few more weeks/months before I have enough jewelry to start a sale.

I also really want to do a big huge garage sale this summer but my brain is too fried to start planning that yet. But it's on my backburner for the future.

You all are so wonderful for being part of this with us!! I'm starting to really appreciate how special it is that we get to experience something that most people don't experience in their life, and it's starting to sink in more and more that this is really happening. God is good, and I'm seeing it more and more everyday as we go through this. Please keep praying for us!!

Q&A and the start of our home study!

Our home study packet arrived on Friday! I've already become CPR certified just in the last 48 hours! I'm so excited to get everything going, I feel like I'm running a race. Oh and I started our profile book too which is what I was most looking forward to doing. I'll share more about that later.

I have been asked so many questions since we opened up and started sharing about our plans to adopt. So I wanted to reach out more and answer more questions because adoption is a really complicated and there are tons of misconceptions about it. So hopefully this will help people understand certain aspects about adoption in general, and also some of our personal feelings about it.

What is the process to adopt?
The first step is the home study, which is done by a social worker and consists of lots of paperwork and documentation, educational training, and three interviews (one of which is done in our home). The home study is done as soon as we complete all of the necessary requirements, but most people say it takes about 3 months to do. Once we are approved and signed up with agencies, our profile book will be shown to expectant mothers and we basically just wait for someone to pick us.

How long will it take us to adopt?
This depends on so many things so it's impossible to answer. Most agencies say it takes 1-2 years.  We are going to be using Christian Adoption Consultants. They act as middle men and connect us with multiple agencies, lawyers and situations across the country. We are hoping this will help the process go smoother and quicker. They say most families match in under a year.

Why is it so expensive to adopt?
I plan to dedicate a whole post to this in the near future, but here is a brief answer. I've heard of people spending as little as $8,000 and as much as $50,000, with the average being between $25,000-$35,000. Crazy right? I think I have finally wrapped my head around why, although I still am shocked by it. It seems like the biggest factors are agency and lawyer fees(mostly for advertising and locating an expectant mother). Birth mother expenses can also vary a lot. It is illegal to pay someone for their baby, but in several states it is legal and expected to cover birth mother expenses such as rent, food, medical Etc. We will be doing fundraising over the next few months to help with the expenses. With Wes still being in medical school there is no way we can do this on our own.
(Someone asked me why domestic adoption is less expensive than international, and I actually don't think it is less expensive. I haven't researched international much but domestic can definitely be just as expensive. Travel and time required in the country is probably a big factor though).

Do we know the gender or race?
Wes and I both want to be open and not put too many limitations on the child that could bless our family. While we know that adopting a child of another race could present different challenges, we are really excited about the possibility of having a diverse family.

Will our adoption be open or closed with the birth family?
We are open to whatever kind of relationship the birth parent(s) want to have. Open adoptions, where there is open communication between the child and biological parents, is what is most recommended. It's healthiest for the child, especially when figuring out their identity. It also seems healthiest for the birth mother which I can completely understand. Closed adoptions with no contact or information are fairly uncommon now.

What is our biggest fear going into this?
Our biggest fear is experiencing a failed adoption. Apparently it is pretty common for this to happen. It's entirely possible that we could show up at the hospital, fall in love with the baby, and then find out that the birth parent(s) have changed their mind and want to parent themselves. And of course they have the right to do that. But in order to love we have to open ourselves up to heartbreak.

What is our biggest hope?
Our biggest hope is to find an amazing expectant mother that we can invite into our family to love our child with us. And obviously we hope that the whole process goes smoothly and quickly.
 
Thanks for checking in on us!! Hope you all had a wonderful weekend!

We are ADOPTING!!

Wes and I are so excited to announce that we are starting the process of ADOPTION! We thought it was fitting to tell everyone today on Mother's Day, since I AM going to become a mother, we just don't have a due date yet. This decision has been on our hearts for a long time and we are filled with peace and joy knowing that this is the direction that God is leading us. We can't wait to see what's in store and to meet our child!

For those of you who don't know us or what has led us here I will fill you in a little. We have been trying to start our family for two years now and I was diagnosed with endometriosis last year. We hoped that with surgery and hormone treatments I would be able to conceive naturally but we still haven't been able to. This has been especially hard for me because I have dreamed of having a nice big family my whole life ever since I was a kid. It feels like those dreams are being ripped away from me, but yet they come so easily for everyone else around me. So once we started realizing that this wasn't going to happen for us like we planned, it was understandably really difficult.

We always wanted to adopt, we just assumed that once we had a few kids and I was a stay at home mom then it would be something we would do. We had no idea that God had other plans for us. It's been a long and bumpy road getting here, but we couldn't be happier and more excited to embark on this new journey of growing our family through adoption. My wounds are slowly going to heal and I know that once we hold our baby for the first time, everything will have been worth it. We already feel so much love for our future child.

So here are some answers to some questions I'm sure you are all wondering.

Where are we at in the process right now:
We are at the very beginning. We just submitted our application and signed our first check to start our home study last week. The home study is conducted by a social worker and takes about 3 months to complete. It includes things like background checks, drug tests, physicals, psych evaluations, an inspection of our home, references, etc. It's pretty rigorous. During the next 3 months we are going to be saving every extra penny we can so that we can sign up with an agency as soon as possible and officially become a waiting family. We are also hoping and praying that maybe there will be a chance for us to find our dear baby through connections of friends and family.

Where are we adopting from:
We are adopting domestically. We can adopt from anywhere in the United States. While we would love to adopt from another country, the waiting time is several years and it's a really complicated and overwhelming process, even more so than domestic, and with Wes being in medical school right now it just didn't feel like the right thing at this time. We both hope that we can add to our family later on by international adoption though.

How you can pray:
Please pray with us for our precious little baby, who is possibly being formed in his or her mother's womb already. Please pray that God's hand will be on our child throughout every stage of development in the womb. Please pray for the expectant mother of our baby, that she would care for her body and baby as best as she can. Please pray for her heart as she makes an adoption plan for her baby, that she would feel confident in her decision to give her child the best life possible. Please pray that our home study goes smoothly and quickly, and for everything on the agency/legal side of things.

How you can help:
Besides praying, please keep us in mind if you know of someone who is expecting and considering an adoption plan for their baby. Often times the best way to connect with an expectant mother is through networking and discovering that someone who knows someone who knows someone is wanting to find a home for their baby.

Thank you for following us and supporting us on our journey to find baby Sorrill!! and HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!